Practical, biblical principles for praying for those who have wandered from the Lord

Introduction

Few passages of Scripture have brought more hope to praying parents, spouses, and friends than Jesus’ parable of the prodigal son found in Luke 15. Most teachings on this familiar story focus either on the younger son who wandered or the father who welcomed him home. Both are important. However, this parable also gives us valuable insight into how we can pray for those who have drifted from the Lord.

This lesson is not intended to be a verse-by-verse study of Luke 15. Instead, we will use key portions of the parable as a framework for prayer. As we move through the story, notice how the actions and responses of both the father and the sons reveal practical principles that can strengthen and direct our intercession.

I encourage you to read Luke 15:11–32 before beginning this lesson, or keep your Bible open as we work through the passage together.

What Is a Prodigal?

The word prodigal means wasteful, extravagant, or recklessly lavish. In Jesus’ parable, the younger son lived a prodigal lifestyle by squandering the inheritance his father had given him.

Over the years, however, our culture has adopted the word prodigal to describe someone who has wandered away from home. In Christian circles, we commonly use the term to describe someone who has wandered from the Lord.

For the purpose of this lesson, a prodigal is a covenant son or daughter—someone who has accepted Christ as Saviour but, for whatever reason, has walked away from that relationship.

Interestingly, while the younger son was prodigal in wasting his inheritance, the father was equally extravagant in extending grace. He did not simply forgive his son; he ran to meet him, embraced him, restored him to the family, and celebrated his return. Throughout this lesson we will keep both pictures in mind: the prodigal who wandered and the Father whose love proved even more extravagant.

Why Do People Become Prodigals?

Every prodigal has a story. Although the reasons are many, two are especially common.

The first is hurt. Some have been wounded by the very people who were meant to represent Christ to them. Abuse, neglect, harsh or improper church discipline, hypocrisy, and unresolved conflict have caused many to become disillusioned with the Church. Children of pastors, elders, and ministry leaders can be particularly vulnerable because they often see both the strengths and the weaknesses of church life from the inside. When those experiences are not processed in a healthy way, disappointment can eventually turn into resentment.

The second is a lack of spiritual foundation. Some believers come to Christ with genuine enthusiasm but receive little discipleship, mentoring, or encouragement to grow. Without strong biblical foundations, they become vulnerable when life’s pressures or temptations arise. Others simply resist the difficult truths that every disciple must eventually face, such as forgiveness, personal responsibility, self-discipline, humility, and surrender to God’s ways.

Understanding why people become prodigals does not excuse sinful choices, but it should remind us that every prodigal is more than a problem to be solved. They are a person deeply loved by God, and that reality should shape both our attitude and our prayers.

Biblical Principles for Prayer

Although I will refer to the prodigal as “he” throughout this lesson, these principles apply equally to sons and daughters, young people and adults, family members and friends. The goal is not to give us a formula for prayer but to help us pray in agreement with the Father’s heart.

Approach the Father

“There was a man who had two sons.” (Luke 15:11)

Notice that Jesus begins the story by introducing the father before He tells us anything about either son. This is significant because our confidence in prayer does not begin with the condition of the prodigal. It begins with the character of the Father.

When someone we love has wandered from the Lord, it is easy to become consumed with what they are doing, where they are, or how far they have drifted. Jesus immediately redirects our attention. Before we focus on the prodigal, He reminds us of the Father’s heart.

Approach God from the position of covenant. Remind yourself that your prodigal is one of His covenant children. Although they may have wandered from Him, He has not abandoned them. The Good Shepherd still leaves the ninety-nine to pursue the one that has strayed, and the Father still longs for His children to return home.

One of the greatest encouragements we have as intercessors is knowing that God loves our prodigal even more than we do. Long before we ever thought to pray, He was already pursuing them. Our prayers are not an attempt to convince God to care; they are our agreement with the heart of a Father who has never stopped loving His child.

Points to Pray About

Thank the Father that His love for your prodigal has never changed.
Pray from the confidence of His covenant promises rather than from fear or discouragement.
Ask the Lord to help you see your prodigal through His eyes rather than through the disappointment of present circumstances.

Pray for Yourself

Before we spend time praying for our prodigal, we should spend some time allowing the Lord to work in our own hearts.

Ask God to fill you with His agape love—a love that remains warm, open, and full of hope even when the other person is making poor choices. Agape love never excuses sin, but neither does it become harsh, bitter, or condemning.

Over the years, I have watched parents become so hurt by a prodigal’s decisions that every conversation becomes an argument, every visit becomes a sermon, and every disappointment becomes another reason to lose hope. That is understandable from a human perspective, but it is not the Father’s heart.

Ask the Lord to protect your heart from resentment, fear, and discouragement. Pray that your words will be seasoned with both grace and truth. Your prodigal already knows where they have failed. What they need to encounter in you is the same combination of truth and love that they will eventually find in their heavenly Father.

As intercessors, we cannot control another person’s decisions, but we can continually surrender our own hearts to the Lord so that our attitudes reflect His character.

Points to Pray About

Ask the Lord to fill you with His agape love.
Pray against bitterness, discouragement, fear, and judgment.
Ask God to help your words reflect both grace and truth.
Pray that your relationship with your prodigal will remain open whenever possible.

Pray for the Grace to Let Go

“The younger son gathered all he had and took a journey into a far country…” (Luke 15:13)

One of the most difficult parts of loving a prodigal is recognizing that there are times when we must entrust them to God. The father in Jesus’ story did not approve of his son’s decision, but neither did he chain him to the family home. Although it undoubtedly grieved his heart, he allowed his son to leave.

Many parents carry a heavy burden because they believe it is their responsibility to rescue their prodigal from every poor decision. While there may be occasions when practical help is appropriate, there are also times when our attempts to control the situation only delay the lessons God is trying to teach.

Pray for the grace to let go—not emotionally, but spiritually. Place your prodigal into the Father’s hands again and again. Trust that the Lord is able to reach places your words cannot.

Ask the Lord to help you resist the temptation to preach every time you speak with your prodigal. Learn instead to listen well, to answer honest questions with honesty, and when necessary, to simply say, “I don’t know.” Healthy dialogue often accomplishes far more than another lecture.

Above all, ask God to keep your heart tender. Refuse to allow disappointment to harden into criticism or hopelessness. Leave the door open. Leave the conversation open. Leave your heart open. The Father never closed His heart toward His son, and neither should we.

Points to Pray About

Ask the Lord for the grace to trust Him with your prodigal.
Pray for wisdom to know when to speak and when to remain silent.
Ask God to keep your heart tender and free from judgment.
Pray that your relationship with your prodigal remains marked by love, honesty, and hope.

Pray for Grace and Endurance

Interceding for a prodigal is seldom a short journey. While some people return to the Lord quickly, many do not. It may take months or even years before you see the fruit of your prayers. During that time, it is easy to become discouraged, question whether your prayers are making any difference, or allow present circumstances to overshadow God’s promises.

Ask the Lord for the grace to remain faithful. Pray that your confidence will rest in His character rather than in what you can presently see. Faith is not denying reality; it is choosing to believe that God’s purposes are greater than our circumstances.

As you pray, begin looking beyond the return of your prodigal. Pray with expectation. Begin asking the Lord to prepare everything they will need when they come home. Pray for healthy friendships, wise mentors, a church family that will welcome them, opportunities for growth, and people who will walk beside them as they rebuild their lives. Faith looks ahead and prepares for what God has promised.

Points to Pray About

Ask the Lord for endurance in prayer.
Pray against discouragement and unbelief.
Thank God in advance for your prodigal’s return.
Pray for every provision they will need when they come home.

Pray for the Famine

“When he had spent everything, a severe famine arose in that country, and he began to be in need.” (Luke 15:14)

This is one of the most misunderstood principles in this lesson.

At first glance, praying for a famine seems almost harsh. None of us wants to see someone we love suffer. Yet notice where the turning point occurred in Jesus’ story. The prodigal did not come to his senses while life was easy. As long as his money lasted, his friends surrounded him, and the excitement continued, he had no desire to return home.

The famine did not create the prodigal’s rebellion. It simply exposed the emptiness of the life he had chosen.

We are not praying for tragedy, illness, or disaster. Rather, we are praying that whatever our prodigal has placed their trust in instead of God will ultimately fail to satisfy them. That false trust may be in money, success, relationships, education, pleasure, addictions, popularity, or even their own ability to control their circumstances. Whatever has become a substitute for God will eventually prove itself to be an empty well.

Pray that the novelty of sin wears off. Pray that the enemy’s counterfeit promises are exposed for what they truly are. Pray that unhealthy relationships lose their influence and that “fair weather” friends disappear when they are no longer useful. Ask the Lord to remove every false support that keeps your prodigal from recognizing their need for Him.

Sometimes God’s greatest act of mercy is allowing us to discover that everything we depended upon apart from Him was never capable of satisfying the deepest needs of our hearts.

Points to Pray About

Pray that false sources of security will no longer satisfy your prodigal.
Ask the Lord to expose the emptiness behind the enemy’s counterfeit promises.
Pray that unhealthy influences and relationships lose their hold.
Ask God to awaken a desire for something more than the world can offer.

Pray for a Holy Hunger

The famine created more than physical hunger. It awakened something much deeper.

At some point, the prodigal remembered what life had once been like in his father’s house. He remembered the security, the provision, and the relationship he had taken for granted. The things that had once seemed ordinary suddenly became precious.

Pray that your prodigal will experience a holy hunger—a longing that cannot be satisfied by anything this world offers. Pray that they will remember the sweetness of walking with God and begin to miss His presence.

One of the enemy’s greatest lies is convincing people that they have forgotten what it was like to know the Lord. I do not believe that is true. Contrary to their protest, a person never forgets a genuine encounter with God. They may suppress those memories for a season, but the Holy Spirit has a remarkable way of bringing them back to mind at exactly the right moment.

Pray that your prodigal will remember the peace they once knew, the joy they once experienced, and the Father’s faithfulness in their life. Ask the Holy Spirit to awaken those memories until they become stronger than the attractions that first drew them away.

Points to Pray About

Pray that your prodigal will long once again for fellowship with God.
Ask the Holy Spirit to remind them of His faithfulness.
Pray that spiritual hunger becomes greater than worldly desire.
Thank God that no genuine encounter with Him is ever wasted.

Pray That the Prodigal Comes to Himself

“But when he came to himself…” (Luke 15:17)

Those five words describe one of the greatest miracles in the entire story.

Before anyone can truly return to the Father, they must first come to themselves. They must see their situation honestly. Until that happens, every excuse seems reasonable, every wrong decision appears justified, and every problem is someone else’s fault.

Pray that your prodigal’s eyes will be opened to the truth. Ask the Holy Spirit to break through deception, pride, self-justification, and misplaced confidence.

Many people believe that if they can simply reason with a prodigal long enough, they will eventually change their mind. Sound reasoning certainly has its place, but intellectual arguments alone cannot accomplish what only the Holy Spirit can do.

A miraculous, God-given gift of self-awareness must work in the heart. Human reasoning may reach the mind, but without the help of the Holy Spirit it cannot reach the heart.

Pray that your prodigal will recognize their true condition and realize that what they are searching for cannot be found apart from the Father.

Points to Pray About

Pray for spiritual understanding and self-awareness.
Ask the Holy Spirit to expose deception.
Pray that pride and self-sufficiency give way to humility.
Ask God to reveal the Father’s invitation to return home.

Pray for the Gift of True Repentance

“I will arise and go to my father…” (Luke 15:18)

Repentance is one of God’s greatest gifts because it opens the door to freedom, restoration, and renewed fellowship with Him.

The prodigal did more than admit he was hungry. He made a decision. “I will arise and go to my father.” His repentance was demonstrated by a change in direction.

Biblical repentance is much deeper than simply feeling sorry for our mistakes or regretting the consequences of our choices. It is a change of mind that results in a change of direction—a turning away from sin and a turning toward the Father.

As you pray, ask the Lord to give your prodigal a humble and teachable heart. Pray that they will respond quickly to the conviction of the Holy Spirit rather than resisting His voice. True repentance is never something to fear. It is one of the Father’s greatest gifts because it leads His children back into freedom.

Points to Pray About

Pray for the gift of genuine repentance.
Ask God for humility and transparency.
Pray that conviction produces lasting change.
Thank the Lord that repentance always leads toward life.

Pray That the Prodigal Can Receive the Father’s Grace

“While he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion, and ran and embraced him…” (Luke 15:20)

Many prodigals have no difficulty believing that God forgives other people. Their struggle is believing He could ever fully forgive them.

Some have lived with deep shame for so long that they cannot imagine being welcomed home. They fear they have crossed a line, gone too far, or wasted too many years for God to receive them again.

The prodigal in Jesus’ story had already prepared his speech. He was willing to come home as a servant because he no longer believed he could be received as a son. His expectations were shaped by guilt rather than by the character of his father.

How often do we do the same?

The father interrupted his carefully rehearsed speech with an embrace. Before the son could earn his place back, the father restored the relationship.

Pray that your prodigal will have the ability to receive the Father’s love, forgiveness, and grace. Pray against shame, self-condemnation, and self-rejection. Ask the Holy Spirit to convince them that the Father’s desire is not merely to forgive them, but to restore them to fellowship.

Points to Pray About

Pray that shame and condemnation will be broken.
Ask the Lord to help your prodigal receive His forgiveness.
Pray that they will once again see themselves as sons or daughters, not servants trying to earn God’s acceptance.
Thank the Father that His grace is always greater than our failures.

Pray for the Elder Brother

“Now his older son was in the field…” (Luke 15:25)

Long before the prodigal comes home, those already in the Father’s house need a change of heart.

One of the greatest obstacles a returning prodigal may face is not the Father’s willingness to forgive, but the attitude of those waiting inside the house.

The elder brother had faithfully remained with his father, yet his heart had become hardened toward his younger brother. Instead of rejoicing, he became angry. Instead of celebrating, he stood outside criticizing what the father was celebrating.

Notice the language he uses when speaking to his father. He does not say, “My brother has returned.” Instead he says, “This son of yours…”

In his heart, he had already severed the relationship. He no longer saw the prodigal as his brother. He saw him only through the lens of his failures.

The father’s response is equally revealing.

He gently reminds the elder brother, “This brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.”

The father was not only restoring the younger son’s relationship with himself; he was calling the elder brother to restore his relationship with his brother.

This has important implications for us.

If our prodigal returned home today, would they be welcomed with the same grace they received from the Father? Or would they immediately encounter suspicion, resentment, criticism, or constant reminders of their past?

Many families and churches have faithfully prayed for years for a prodigal’s return. Yet when that answer finally arrives, old wounds, unresolved hurt, jealousy, or self-righteousness can become stumbling blocks to the very restoration they have been praying for.

This does not mean we ignore wisdom or pretend trust is instantly restored. Rebuilding trust often takes time. Forgiveness does not erase consequences, and grace does not eliminate the need for healthy boundaries. However, our desire should always be restoration, not punishment.

Pray for every person who has been affected by your prodigal’s choices. Pray for parents, spouses, children, siblings, friends, and church leaders. Ask the Lord to heal disappointment, bitterness, grief, and resentment long before the prodigal returns.

A thankful heart has little room for jealousy. Pray that when God pours out His blessing on your prodigal, those around them will rejoice rather than compare, celebrate rather than criticize, and encourage rather than condemn.

Our goal should be that every returning prodigal encounters the Father’s heart, not the elder brother’s offense.

Points to Pray About

Pray for healing in every person affected by the prodigal’s choices.
Ask the Lord to remove bitterness, resentment, jealousy, and self-righteousness.
Pray that families and church communities will welcome returning prodigals with both grace and wisdom.
Ask God to make you an instrument of restoration rather than a stumbling block.

Pray for the Newly Restored

A prodigal’s return is not the end of the journey. In many ways, it is only the beginning.

Returning to the Father is one step. Learning to walk with Him again is another.

Pray that your prodigal will quickly become established in a healthy local church where they can be discipled, encouraged, and held accountable. Ask the Lord to surround them with mature believers who will walk beside them with patience, wisdom, and love.

Many prodigals have friends who are still far from God. Pray that their testimony of restoration will become a powerful witness to those who knew them before they returned to Christ. Ask the Lord to use their life to draw others into His Kingdom.

Pray for Those Raised in the Church

Church culture can sometimes make it difficult for returning prodigals to feel that they truly belong. Their language, clothing, mannerisms, and life experiences may be very different from those who have faithfully served the Lord for many years.

Pray that the body of Christ will extend grace with wisdom and patience. Ask the Lord to help believers look beyond outward appearances and see the work He is accomplishing in a restored life.

Pray that our churches will become places where truth and grace walk hand in hand—places where people are lovingly discipled without being constantly reminded of who they once were.

As members of Christ’s body, we should desire to become the kind of church family that reflects the Father’s heart: rejoicing when the lost are found, celebrating when sons and daughters come home, and faithfully walking beside them as they continue to grow.

Points to Remember

Begin every prayer by remembering the Father’s heart toward your prodigal.
Pray for your own heart as faithfully as you pray for your prodigal.
Trust God enough to place your prodigal into His hands.
Pray that false sources of security lose their power to satisfy.
Ask the Holy Spirit to awaken a holy hunger for the Father’s presence.
Pray for spiritual awakening, genuine repentance, and the ability to receive the Father’s grace.
Pray not only for your prodigal’s return, but also for their complete restoration.
Prepare your own heart, your family, and your church to receive returning prodigals with both grace and wisdom.

Acknowledgment

This lesson was originally inspired by a message shared by Pastor Ruth Rousu at Harvest Vineyard Christian Fellowship in Edmonton, Alberta, in October 1997. Over the years I have prayerfully revised, expanded, and updated these notes as my understanding of Scripture has continued to grow.

All Bible verses, unless otherwise attributed, are from the English Standard Version (ESV).

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