I’ve been thinking a lot about regret lately. Not the kind that brings change through brief and healthy reflection, but the kind that stalls me from moving forward.
Regret can sound spiritual. It can look like humility or maturity. But when I linger there too long, it stops being helpful. It becomes a place I sit instead of a moment I pass through.
Why regret becomes a trap
There are real things in my past I can look back on and recognize. Opportunities I missed. Moments where fear or unbelief shaped my choices. Naming those things matters.
But I’ve learned that constantly returning to them doesn’t move me forward. It keeps me stuck.
Gratitude is good, nostalgia can stall me
I’ve also noticed another danger that feels almost honouring of the past but is just as limiting: nostalgia.
I can look back and remember past seasons with a glossy filter, forgetting how hard they actually were. I can be grateful for how God met me then, how He carried me and guided me, and still recognize that I’m not meant to live there.
I don’t live in the past. I live now.
Staying present while looking forward
Even if you’re reading this on December 31, today is still a day of new beginnings. I don’t need a calendar change to respond to God. Every day asks me to be present.
At the same time, staying present doesn’t mean drifting. I’ve learned I need to be future-forward too. I need to look ahead and ask, Where is God leading me? What am I moving toward?
That doesn’t require a big plan. Sometimes it starts with a simple, honest conversation with the Lord. Then I ask for practical steps, small and doable, that help bring that future into reality.
Pressing on, even when I feel disqualified
There’s a line in a worship song that keeps coming back to me:
“I don’t have time to maintain these regrets.”
To maintain something is to tend it carefully, to return to it again and again. When I spend my energy maintaining regret, I don’t have much left for the present or the future.
As I was thinking about this, I saw a picture of myself sitting on the side of a dusty path. I’m not moving forward. Not because God stopped me, but because I disqualified myself.
I told myself I failed. That I didn’t keep up. That I didn’t train well enough. That I was undisciplined. That I’d missed my chance.
But God hadn’t benched me. He hadn’t taken me out of the race. I stepped aside on my own.
“Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own… I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.”
Philippians 3:12–14 (ESV)
I’ve realized it can feel easier to stay seated than to get up and keep moving. But even imperfect steps forward take me further than camping on the side of the road in a tent called regret.
So I’m choosing this instead: to stay present, to look ahead with hope, and to keep moving, one imperfect step at a time.
©2025 Katherine Walden
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